Thursday, March 3, 2016

Spiritual lessons

Dear J.,

Here's an interesting event. In real life, I recently (within the past 3-5 years) lost a relationship of great value to me. I think I'm okay with this because I did everything I could for s'her while I had the opportunity. But anyway, the point is that today I lost an object of great physical value to me (my wallet). I did the normal thing of checking possible places where it could have fallen out, praying for help to be clear-minded, etc. Still no luck.

Prompted by the Spirit, I felt like this might be one of those times where you just have to write it off and move on with life. So I prepared to leave for work, pulling out some socks from my drawer and thinking about how I might check for the missing wallet at work and the drop by the bank afterwards to begin the process of replacing everything. And also prompted by the Spirit, I said another prayer, not asking this time for help finding it or being clear minded or anything, but just to learn whatever it was that I need to learn from the experience.

And I went to the kitchen table to put my socks and shoes on, and pulled out the chair to sit on... and the wallet was there on the chair. Somehow it had fallen out of my back pocket last night while playing D&D. And... huh. Five seconds after the prayer, and there it is? And now I don't have to go through all the not-tragic but not-fun experiences I was anticipating. Was the lesson completed by the fact that I was willing to stop wanting it? I did ask to learn what I needed to learn, and that's what came immediately to mind...

So I paused for a moment to write this note so I don't forget. Tentatively, what I'm getting out of this is, if I had to translate it into words, "Move forward. But don't worry, be happy." I think I'm making the right choices. BTW, that doesn't mean I expect to get that relationship back. But I do expect to feel perfectly okay in a few years about letting s'her go.


If I esteem mankind to be in error, shall I bear them down? No. I will lift them up, and in their own way too, if I cannot persuade them my way is better; and I will not seek to compel any man to believe as I do, only by the force of reasoning, for truth will cut its own way.

I could not love thee, dear, so much,
Loved I not Honor more.

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